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# 3 Parenting Competency—Relationship Skills  

Relationship skills come in at number three in our list of factors that are important in parenting.  Though many don’t think of this in relation to parenting, a positive relationship between parents is very important for the well being of children.  In addition, it is good for parents to model good relationship skills and good relationship management, both with co-parents and with other people.

For parents who are together, children are most comfortable when they have a sense of the connection and affection between their parents and when there is a minimum of tension in the relationship.  When there is conflict it is good for children to see it addressed and resolved.  Children are very uncomfortable with conflict between the two people in the world who are most important to them – their parents.

This is also important even when parents aren’t together.  Separated parents shouldn’t bad mouth each other and should minimize conflict in front of their children.  While this can be difficult at times, it is helpful for separated parents to remember that no matter what happened in their relationship, both need to have as good of a relationship as possible with their children.

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